new mantra

inside jokes

This morning I had an inside joke with a stranger on the subway. We were both sitting comfortably on our seats (along with another older woman), luxuriously enough everyone on our bench was small (NOT fat) and we reaped the rewards of being normal, healthy sizes by having a little room to shift around in comfort if need be.
THEN the Queen Elizabeth wanna-be paraded on to the train and demanded the three of us move over so she could “squeeze in there”. Squeeze is an understatement. There was about 4 inches IF THAT for her to sit down. So we all obeyed royal demands and squished together like sardines in a tin. She couldn’t even fit her full self onto the seat and because of her Royal Pride she just sort of sat on the edge acting as if Nothing Had Happened.
Everyone was just kind of sitting there in shock and then the older lady on the far end, on the other side of her, finally got up and moved, due to, I am sure, the uncomfortable and awkward circumstances HRH had put as all in.
Of course HRH didn’t expect anyone else to sit on the bench with her after the other lady moved.
Finally, at 59th and Fifth the last standing victim on the bench and myself got up and exited. Then we looked at each-other and without saying a word we both giggled at the ridiculousness that had ensued.
Inside Jokes With Strangers.

goldy locks

i need my braid to look like this.
k thanks.

i miss my grandfather

I don't believe in death. I know that sounds so silly, but I just don't. Its an easy way out of being Sad. Its been 5 years since my Amazing grandfather "died". I usually just never think about it ever since it happened, because if I do, of course I will just cry and get angry and that has never solved anything. I didn't even cry at the wake or funeral, because I just didn't believe it actually happened... with over 200 people from all over the country crammed into a tiny incense smelling chapel, pouring out onto the lawn, it just all seemed surreal that this was for my own grandfather.
William Charles....God rest your soul. The funniest, most original, most entertaining, smartest, classiest, most cultured man I have ever met. And wonderful chef of course, absolutely wonderful.

A Renaissance Man
William Koneazny was a chef, a radio host, a critic, a saloon keeper, a veteran of two armed forces in two wars, an author of two cookbooks and two books on the Roman Catholic Church.
He and his brother, Jack, founded the Peerless Tree Expert Company in 1945, and he was among the first to be licensed as an arborist by the state of Connecticut.
Beginning in 1947, Mr. Koneazny was a host on the radio talk show, the ''Bill Wicky Hour,'' on a station in Torrington, and he ran a tavern, the Pearly Gates Saloon in Sheffield, Mass., just over the state line. Mr. Koneazny was employed as a restaurant reviewer by two newspapers, The Lakeville Journal and The Connecticut Western Newspaper.
Mr. Koneazny, a Hartford native, graduated from Weaver High School in 1944 and saw service in the Merchant Marine in World War II and in the Army in the Korean War.
Mr. Koneazny died June 16. He was 77.

New York Times

The Extraordinary Who Lived Among Us
By DICK AHLES
Published: December 26, 2004

http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9D07E1D61030F935A15751C1A9629C8B63&sec=&spon=&pagewanted=10

Worst Sleeps Ever

I can't sleep these days. Well, sometimes I can, but it's usually only after an ambien (or 2) and an Anxious Free Day (those are totally rare). Last night I was oh-so-lucky enough to wake up @ 3am to rain pouring on my head! That's what's cool about having a window right next to the head of your bed and leaving it open during a windy rainstorm. I might as well have been camping outside on my stoop.
What was also really really neat was that all of my books on my night-stand were drenched and probably ruined. I was pretty dazed so I just shoved them all on the floor as fast as I could and then laid my weary head back down on my rain drenched pillow.
On a lighter note, this is my New Favourite Movie and I have already seen it twice in the theatre, totally plan on seeing it 3 more times if it's still playing:


It really is so great and I don't care if people think it's silly, it's NOT silly and it's NOT a Love Story. Go see it. I might start working for this movie as a promoter.

i'm cynical, i was told.

a: do you always get your way?
me: yes, but only with the things that don't matter.
i found 2 lucky pennies today!!! of course that doesn't mean anything. i must have found over a thousand lucky pennies in the past 4 years and i haven't seen one ounce of GL. come on!!!!

as i lay thinking

here is what i have realised:
being in love with the idea of someone is very different than actually being in love with them.

here is a quote i read that really struck me:
"...and then I found that girl watching me. If her eyes had a been pistols, I wouldn't be talking now. I be dog if they didn't blaze at me."
As I Lay Dying. William Faulkner.

my mom has a look that shoots like pistols. she always had. if you were in really big trouble, she didn't even have to say a word. she just gave you "that look" and you knew it wasn't going to be a happy ending. moms have a way of doing that. i am beginning to practice mine. for who knows when.